Sunday, September 30, 2012
How to say no to sex (for teens)
Okay, so we're talking about sex when you are teen and not married of course. Always, best place to begin is with what God says--the BIBLE, after all, sex was His idea in the first place.
1 Corinthians 6:18 Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.
God gives us instruction and laws to obey, not because He is mean, but because He wants the best for us. Sex outside of marriage is harmful to us and the other person involved.
When you are a teenager, it seems like it's what EVERYONE is doing. But the truth is that the wise are waiting for vows to be made, rings exchanged and their wedding night for that first experience of sex to begin.
REMEMBER: Sex out of marriage will hurt you more than it will ever feel good.
What can you do when you are pressured to have sex?
1). RUN. Physically get out of the situation. Like Joseph in the Bible, he ran out of His master's house when the master's wife wanted to have sex with him.
Make like Joe and GO! FAST!
2). Tell your boyfriend/girlfriend that if they really love you, they will wait. If they reverse it on you, "that if you love them, then you will" I suggest offering them the door and saying, find someone else to sleep with you and I'll find someone who will love me and my decision to wait.
3). Decide ahead of time. Make this as non-negotiable in your head (meaning it's not up for debate, arguing or being pressured) that you are not going to harm yourself or your boyfriend/girlfriend by having sex out of marriage. That's wisdom baby!
Sex out of marriage is dangerous, there are unseen injuries that are done that you might not realize are even hurting you. Statistically speaking, the more sexual partners you have the less likely your marriage will work. That's also why each marriage after your first marriage, has a higher and higher failure rate.
Think of your body like a piece of duct tape, the more you stick it to things, the less sticky it gets. It's best when stuck only once to something, that holds the most staying power. Why waste it on some turd in high school?
In all the emails I get, I've only received letters of heartbreak concerning those had sex and didn't wait.
Sex is like a fire. It's a beautiful and wonderful thing when it's keep in the safety of a fireplace (marriage), but if you put that same fire in the middle of the floor in your house, it will destroy beyond comprehension.
Sex throws out a million tiny little anchors into the other person, it's designed to do this. It's to be for life, to hold you together. But outside of marriage, it's will rip your very heart out of your body when you breakup with that person and you will FEEL that you are dying, the pain is that real. Sex is not a casual thing, the world will tell you that, but they are dead wrong. Sex is the most serious thing you can do with another person.
Well, what if you already did it? You can ask God to forgive you, to cleanse you from it and He will. He promises:
Isaiah 1:18 "Come now, let's settle this," says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool."
The best advice I have is to be wise now, and wait until you are married to have sex. Even if you have already done it, you can stop and wait until you are married. You can have all the sex you want then, and studies show that women enjoy sex most when they are married and older than the teen years.
If a guy threatens to break up with you because you won't have sex with him, then he is not worth dating! If he REALLY loved you, he would respect your decision and not try to take what belongs to your future husband and you.
Remember that no boyfriend/girlfriend deserves ALL of you, they haven't made the covenant with you before God to have access to your heart, soul and mind.
Just say NO.
Your loving big sister, friend or cousin--however you would like to think of me. I share this stuff because I love you and don't want you hurt or to suffer.
Sex as a teen won't change your life into something amazing. You won't be prettier, taller, cooler or smarter. Just look at all the adults who are married and have had all the sex they wanted, they aren't any of those things because of having sex! Ha ha ha!
No matter what you have done, stop and wait for marriage before you give your whole self. You will be glad you did!
Posted by Tiffany at 10:24 PM